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The Funny Farm: Adventures With Chickens

I think most chicken keepers have some pretty entertaining stories related to their flock: falls, injuries (their own, not their birds), encounters with predators, disputes with neighbours, birds in the house, lessons in DIY vet care and the list goes on.

Here’s a few stories to bring a smile to your face and maybe some thoughts of “better them than me”.


Janis Royse  

Leave it to me to cause something as simple and beautiful as a pair of earrings (I actually dug the Topaz in these earrings from the earth and had them custom made) cause utter chaos and panic. I was watering my chickens just after dusk this evening when I hung their water bucket on a chain that is suspended inside their pen (chickens are dumb and will poop all over their water bucket if they can get on top of it, which is why it is on a chain) when my earring got caught in the chain. I couldn’t move and the bucket was heavy and pulling down on my ear. I was trying not to panic, but there was no hope of my partner hearing my calls for help inside the house. I just knew I was stuck there for the long haul. Thankfully, after I calmed down, I was able to slowly work the earring out of my ear and get free from the chain. Once free, I was able to get my earring loose from the chain without any damage. Seriously, what are the chances? Darn Chickens.


Jojo Smith

Good morning, here’s a laugh for everyone. My 10 year old daughter does gymnastics. We were running behind because I was busy watering and feeding my girls. We had to hurry into the car and down the road. I never go inside, but I chose to do so this time. I was sitting alone by all these moms, their hair was perfect, all cackling and what not. Shortly after sitting there for a few moments I looked around to scan my surroundings and realized I’m there in my back yard shoes (chicken poo covered), sweat pants, big jacket and hair that hasn’t been brushed.  I can only imagine the whispers and looks I was getting.


Christi Boyle  

I started my morning running through the yard barefoot in my nightgown to save one of my young chickens from a young hawk. It flew off when it saw me barreling toward it, boobs flopping, waving my arms and yelling.  I’m sure my neighbours loved the show. The little chick is struggling, but I’m trying to nurse her back to health. Now that my heart’s pumping we may have an added lesson in chicken bandaging today. Life on the homestead is always interesting.


Jewel Steier  

I live in a small town of 700 people. A fox was breaking into my chicken coop early in the morning. I was only wearing a t-shirt and underwear (not even a bra) when I saw from my bedroom window it take off with my girl. I took off running, grabbed the rake and ran after it for almost two blocks up the road. My neighbours know I’m a crazy chicken lady but it’s stuck in stone now.

I was able to catch up to the fox, hit him with the rake and yelled for my chicken to run. She ran right to the kitchen. I found her huddled in a ball next to my shoes. She lost most of her back feathers and has a cut on her back, but otherwise she’s fine.


Amy Wilkerson  

Tonight I was bitten by my first rat snake while removing her from the coop. Not a big deal because even though she was going to town on my knuckle, it didn’t hurt. (I washed and cleaned up the bite with alcohol.) She had been taking far more than her fair share of eggs as of late.  Since the rain started here her slithering bottom has been held up in the coop eating her fill plus some.  I decided to evict my unworthy tenant. To be fair, I don’t blame her for the whole biting thing because I totally would have bitten my ass too for throwing me out in this weather! However, she also musked on my hand which seems a little over the top after the biting and egg snatching. She should have seen this coming. 


Kyra Sanchez  

The scare of my life. An hour ago I was going back to sleep after my husband left for work. I had a rough night actually but nothing compares to 30 minutes ago when things went from silence to utter chaos. I darted out of bed, jumped over the pineapple that mysteriously fell at 3 am (adding to my paranoia and restless night) and went straight outside to my chickens to find my coops like this. I was alone at 6am, light barely starting to come through, in my granny pyjamas, hair full of dandruff treatment and disgusting morning face. It turns out that yesterday hubby thought I closed the pens and I thought that he did, which has never happened before. Anyways the chaos was because I have two rival roosters in each pen. Those two decided to have a morning showdown to mom’s now heart attack. Once separated everyone was accounted for, thankfully no random serial killer opened up my coops in order to lure me outside, no roosters were hurt in the process.Thankfully my very intimidating guardian dogs did their jobs which entails a day full of treats, even more love than what we give them and more spoiling.

For those of you intrigued about the pineapple: I want to clarify that I have no cats inside my house at the moment. I heard a noise in the early morning around 3 am.  I very cowardly walked out of bed and into my living room. I saw the thing on the floor and said nope and went back to sleep. No one has touched the pineapple. I cannot explain how it suddenly just ‘fell’. The worst part is after all the chaos with the chickens my husband called me. After the chicken conversation I asked him, “Why didn’t you picked up the pineapple before heading out?” He replied,  “What pineapple?” I thought I was going insane, I took a picture of evidence just so that he could see that there is a pineapple in the middle of the floor. You best believe I am now in my room with my bedroom door LOCKED.


Thanks to everyone who shared their stories and photos.

If you’ve got a story to share drop me a line using the ‘contact’ button on my homepage.

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