Eggs The Funny Farm

The Funny Farm: Store Bought Eggs

This week’s spotlight is shared by Misty, a Bitchin’ Chickens veteran and guest contributor of The Swingle Chicken Chronicles and newcomer to this site, Kryss – both with their observations about eggs.

Misty Elmore Swingle

What is wrong with this picture?! The problem is that egg. The egg is not from my chickens but from the store. First time in a year we have had to buy store bought eggs. The Silkies haven’t laid one darn egg yet. The little bantam chickens only laid maybe twice a week if we were lucky. And my big girl Welsummer hen has completely stopped giving me her daily rent of eggs.

Google tells me this is normal in the winter months. My husband thinks the chickens are broken. My daughter is happy to be eating eggs that come from a store and not a pet’s butt. I’m just over here wondering if I can get another coop to get some Easter Egger chickens that are supposed to be good egg layers and lay coloured eggs. The chickens here just want to be fed.

Kryss Cochran Helfrich

Years ago when my daughter was about sixteen she had, at the time, her best friend over to spend the night. In the morning I was making eggs for breakfast. The girl noticed all the eggshells were brown and wanted to know what FACTORY I bought them from. I explained that they came from our chickens. The girl went on to insist that eggs came from a factory and that the shells where the packaging. When I explained where the eggs actually came from she went into hysterics and called her mother to come get her right NOW!

Her mother was at our house in seconds and she left without another word.

Two days later I was called into the counselor’s office at the school to meet with the mother. I swear I thought it was a joke. I went in and was informed that I had caused serious mental anguish to the girl and that she would no longer be able to be friends with my daughter. A note from the counselor was sent home to the parents of my daughter’s other friends alerting them that we were a working farm and if parents felt their child would be mentally impacted by knowing where eggs came from not to allow them to visit our home. I literally got calls from all of her other friends’ parents asking me if the letter was a joke.

Guess what? The mother of that one girl tried to sue us for mental anguish. She actually got laughed out of the courtroom and the judge scorned her attorney for taking her case.

And yes, some people really don’t know where eggs come from.

Many thanks to Misty Elmore Swingle and Kryss Cochran Helfrich for sharing their stories, used with permission. Featured photo credit: Ready Egg

If you have a story you’d like to share feel free to drop me a line by using the ‘contact’ button on my home page.

2 comments on “The Funny Farm: Store Bought Eggs

  1. The second anecdote had me sitting here with my mouth open as I processed the story. As a retired teacher, I can visualize the administrative eye rolling before deciding to try to smooth the waters. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Claire Ann

    That’s hilarious and sad at the same time.

    Liked by 1 person

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