The Funny Farm

The Funny Farm: The Lighter Side Of Keeping Chickens 2

If you keep chickens for any length of time you’ll have plenty of sad stories to tell about injuries, illness and predators, to name a few. We all need some laughter to balance out the sweat and tears that our birds demand of us. So grab a coffee and smile, courtesy of some fine folks that keep chickens and love to talk about them.

Brooke Bishop

I got Cochins because I heard they were one of the sweetest breeds. Y’all, this girl has it out for me. Every morning I pick her up to try to bond with her a little bit. Well this morning I went out to tell her, “You’re such a pretty bir…” this fool went straight for the lip! She chomped her little dinosaur mouth down and shook my lip like it was a snake!  So now I just take deep breaths and remember why I give grace to these chickens. She’ll be sweet eventually. She’ll be sweet eventually. She better be sweet soon!

Donna Ray

I have a pissed off broody hen who I found in the feed building behind the feed tubs.

She is NOT happy and flew at my face determined to claw my eyes out and rip the flesh from my hand. After a fight and two trips back to get all the eggs I now have her in a dog kennel with 15 eggs! After twenty minutes of screaming and bawking (I am sure she was cussing me out and I am glad I couldn’t understand her) she is now settled down trying to fit all the eggs under her. If I go check on her she growls at me and gives me the evil eye.

Danielle Breach

I was working nights at the time so every morning I would come home from work and take care of the pets, including letting the chickens out of their coop, have a snack and then go to bed. At some point I was woken up by the sound of our rooster. He was so loud! I thought, he must be right outside our bedroom I had woken up to his crowing several times before I began to worry that perhaps there was a predator outside or that something else must be wrong. I rolled out of bed and threw on my bathrobe. Our house is a split-level and our bedroom is downstairs so I walked upstairs to our main landing.

I found a chicken standing at the top of the stairs. Confused at how she had gotten in, I looked to see if the back door was open and sure enough it was. It must not have latched when I came in that morning and the wind had blown it open about 6″ or so. Then I heard a noise upstairs. I looked up to find 14 chickens standing in our living room. They were on the couch, chairs, handrail to the stairs and even the dining room table. Of course they had pooped everywhere! They had to have been in the house for several hours. To top things off our old bulldog was fast a sleep on the couch and didn’t even notice that she was surrounded by chickens. We have a camera in our foyer so going back to watch the look on my face was priceless.

Tara Ingram

My rooster started crowing over and over at 11 pm just now. I went out to see what was going on. My dog that sleeps in the coop likes to sniff chicken butts while they are standing on the roost. He accidentally knocked one off the roost and she couldn’t see to get back up. I put her back on the roost and the crowing stopped and everyone went back to sleep.

Donna Lammar

Friend: What are you up to this evening?

Me: I’m just snuggling my rooster

Friend: Seriously though?

Me: No, for real. Snuggling my rooster.

Child: Snaps picture

Me: Crazy chicken lady status keeps getting deeper!

Husband: Laughs

Joelle Carrier Hagel

When you come home to your dog on top of your rooster pulling out his tail feathers you make him sit with the rooster on top of him and give I’m sorry kisses.

Holly Taylor Mead

Note to self: when you are sick with the flu, your indoor Call Duck might not be the best choice for a ‘nurse’. His bedside manner isn’t very good and taking a dump in his diaper inches from my face was just cruel. Good thing I adore him.

Erica Paige Grove

I asked my mom for “chicken stuff” for my birthday. She typed that into the Amazon site and these popped up first so she got them. She didn’t think I would wear them. Umm, ya right! I’m walking my girls into school wearing them after Christmas break.

Tabatha Amos Steed

I have loads of reasons why I’m a crazy chicken mama, but I’ll share the most recent.

I just spent an hour and a half outside walking my property because one of my favorite ladies was missing. I had plans for dinner and cancelled them. I told the friends I was meeting, “sorry my chicken is missing.” I finally gave up hope and started crying. I decided to just make sure my coops were secure so that I didn’t lose anyone else tonight. I walked over to one of the coops, bleary-eyed from crying, and there was the little sneaky thing, hiding in the back of the coop where she never goes and with chickens she doesn’t like.

Forget germs and salmonella, I kissed that hen, gave her hugs and sobbed into her feathers. She thought I was insane and just wanted treats.

Many thanks to everyone who contributed their stories and photos. Featured photo: Jennifer Bullock

If you have a story to share feel free to drop me a line by using the ‘contact’ button on my home page.

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